stalled at the age when you could hurt me most

as far as i can remember, i had always been on extreme ends of the spectrum. i dont do like. either i love it or i hate it. i was brought up to be strong that way.

recently, i found myself clinging on to things that aren't there anymore. without realizing, we've already left that place and time and stepped foot into another.

it never lasts long or feels real enough. perhaps, it was something we've been waiting for that never came to exist.

standing at the crossroads where i am now, the moment of truth appears. where universes collide, do i wait for what i want, to collide with what i've lived?

what are my chances anyways?

for what it's worth, i've not forgotten how it feels like to love and be loved.

still, i sink a lil deeper each time love found me. i watch myself go just a lil bit further. until there's nothing left but suffocation.

how many of us ever realize how stuck in the past we really are...

sighs.