Favourite twins

Totally missing my favourite twins tonight. Back in those days when we were staying together, everyday was an adventure. I felt like I was living in a dollhouse with life sized dollies!

And look at how they've grown over the years. For some reason, I just feel super proud of them even though I didn't do anything much except by giving them all my sisterly love. 

So cute they make me so proud. Does it even make sense?

This photo on Instagram made me laughed. Too cute. 

          

Haven't seen baileys in forever! Every time we passed by pasir ris when we used to bring Chloe to the pets farm I was always so tempted to ask them along! But I never did cos just didn't know if they were even home. Guess we won't be going there anytime soon after Chloe passed away. 

            

What touched me most was how Rowena sneakily organised my 25th birthday and surprised me by gathering all my closest beloved high school & university friends! I love being surrounded by loved ones and she knows that. Of course she does.  

They're crazy fun and we were super tight. That's why they're still my favourite twins.

That's us. Toys r Us and all. Barefaced and youthful. 

These photos hardly ring a bell but I found them somewhere. And my crazy spunky hairdo! Growing up with them was really an adventure like I said! I think I must be the craziest ever-changing, ever-evolving sissy they never had. Hahaha. So much love! 

Aimee made up the fourth leg whom I miss equally dear! We didn't always get along but once we did, there were fireworks like you've never seen before!

         

Our swimming days before she officially got attached with her Prince Charming. 

          

           

Some time ago during one of our meetup. When life rocked just by us being there for each other. 

                  

           

I truly miss my Channy twins and Aimee dear.

Edit: I went home and digged for more pictures of our youth and found some photo albums! Not the kind you find on Facebook but the Kodak-moments, non-photoshopped kind. 

When Roxanne was just a ickle doll! She must be 15 yo at that time. We were celebrating the ex's 21st birthday aka their big brother. My hairdo was all sorts of funky. 

             

With my favourite pretty auntie. She was a second mom to me. We were really close and she treated me like one of her own kids. She was family. So were all of them. 

          

Too cute for words. Women of the house! 

               

Such good times, though short-lived, will always be etched in my eternal memory! :)

Grandfather Stories

I am mentally unprepared to deal with all of these. All I have now is sadness beneath this phony facade. I might as well come out right now to say I am so sentimental my soul is a hundred years old. Truth is, I don't take to departures so well yet I have recently shared and even written about it boldly.

I'd like to share a little nugget that makes me smile in reminiscence. Do you know who's the funny one in my extended family? Not that cousin who went to drama classes or the auntie with hilarious story-telling talent. It was my very dear Grand dad. He was a jolly character, the real funny one, before Dementia stole his dear humour and slowly controlled his soul. Though slight in build with thin limbs, he was big on humour. What I fondly remembered most about him pre-Dementia was his rambunctious laughter. I am beginning to miss that. I was planning to introduce my partner to him this CNY.

My last moment with him was never had. Except this morning's tale which I leaked online through a tweet status.

I had interrupted sleep when a thin palm stroked the back of my head during the hour before day breaks. In my semi slumber, I considered jumping out of bed. Oddly, there was no fear whatsoever in my heart. "Not possible", I thought. Yet, I felt unusually comforted. So, I prayed for it to stop so I could fall back asleep. In the morning when the last alarm went off, I decided I had a peculiar dream. Of course, I still felt uneasy but there were more pressing things on my mind.

Could that guardian angel be my Grand dad?

::

The only way I know to work through my emotions was to pack. I would pack anything in my sight and only care to rest upon complete exhaustion.

It's my therapy.

I ended up junking a sizeable amount of shoes and clothes. 

unusual saturday

i'm thoroughly spent.

boy am i glad i dragged myself out of bed this morning. everything started right.

given, i actually rolled out of bed late but i managed to time everything down to perfection.

made a few planned trips to the far east of the island. ponggol clinic, check. spend time with dear people, check. sofaman with amanda, check.

gotta say i did things i usually wouldn't do. been to places i typically wouldn't frequent. if i have to explore my vocabulary for a single word to describe my day, it would have to be unbeatable.

i also bumped into Joel, my favourite special kid from the good old days of special education. i couldn't stop marvelling at his little antics that i used to adore. he didn't see me though i wished he could have. truth was, i was rushing to be on time as the clinic's closing. back at the school, it was love at first sight with this kid and i've often wondered how he's been.

he's the cutest thing i've ever seen, and i've seen a lot. for professional reasons, i can't post his pictures. but hopefully one day, i can!

also, i saw a former primary school friend at the clinic! i promptly shared with rox and surprisingly had her tell me about her chance encounter with her previous secondary school mate as well as her uncle's encounter with a really old school friend. what an amazing place for chance encounters, really! i am so impressed.

memories are like aged wine, the older the better

woke up to a bad stomach this morning and i really had to go at once. we had a quasi communal dinner along one of those restaurant type eateries at capitol building (opposite cityhall station) in which i ate really little compared to normal and thus have no rationale for my upset stomach. perhaps my food was laced with “special ingredient”.

it was easy to recall what i ate. during an impromptu lunch with terence, eugene and ericia yesterday, i had noodles and i had it again for dinner with cat, yongan and ericia (it seems like ages ago when many a times the two of us would meet up to twice in a day and yesterday was terrific as such). both times my meals were more than half unfinished. appetite literally went down by half. i have no idea why except that it could just be a passing phase. my cravings have been geared towards sweeter and savoury stuff. i know i shouldn’t have ice cream (due to period cramps) but i couldn’t resist when we pass mcdonalds. another thing i’ve wanted to re-introduce to my diet is juicing. i need a new juicer to replace the cranky one. i miss the goodness of juicing. i’d do it now if i have a juicer. but i need to prioritize my spending. and juicing might just have to wait till next month. i’m not sure if my lack of appetite is resulted from stress. perhaps it was the past two stressful weekends working from home. you can be sure i’m looking forward to this one with much fervor since i hadn’t enjoyed the past two.

i’m toying with the idea of unlocking my old blog entries. to be honest, i first asked myself for permission to re-read old entries. i didn't want to bring up indignation from within no matter how righteous it seems. the pre-requisite was that i had to be emotionally balanced and as a matter of fact, i just spent the past two nights chuckling, smiling and indulging in older and dearer long-lost memories of yesteryear. while there was sadness that tugged at my heartstrings, i realized i chronicled mostly good times. more saliently, the best times were chronicled around school, group studies, outings, friendship, a little of struggling with keeping my emotional battle in check, and how my general attitude was formed towards life. of course, and happier times when i was in love. it pretty much generates positive vibes reflective of the current self i present to the world today. at least that's what i feel.

in retrospect, i felt i have forgotten how to be a girlfriend. the last i checked, i'm single for two and a half years now. i don't know if that's possible but that's pretty much how i feel right now. i also realized that many times i make plans based on how i feel and every futuristic plan exclude an important outlook on love. at times, i have a very sticky stand on things. and i have criterias now, compared to just a couple of years ago.

i don't have much pet peeves and is actually quite nice but a default way to irk me would be to impose your views on my beliefs with gusto. i respect every opinion because each is entitled to his or her own. i like a good challenge but sometimes very close friends would enforce their values on me and i'd always let it slide cos i know it's with kind intent. i want to bring joy to people. sometimes i wish people can see that.

anyway, i’m going to start loosening some leg muscles this weekend. i lugged home my running shoes after working out at the club yesterday. ericia is having a stay over at zizhong’s prearranged birthday chalet with the “hehs” clique. i know for sure she’s going to have an exciting albeit exhausting weekend. i’d love to have her as a movie companion tonight but she’s zipping off to help out after work. instead, i might probably just catch it on my own.

Up, here goes nothing. =)

better together

there are just too many treasures i found in the archives and here are just a few scattered pieces. i love to share them.

get the skinny on: those lean years

rocking out before school


v-day roses from gid


project mates








Mmmm, It's always better when we're together
Yeah we'll look at the stars and we're together
Well, it's always better when we're together
Yeah it's always better when we're together
(jack johnson - better together)

you'd think 'there isn't much i haven't already known'

no news means good news.

it's been a depressing couple of days. many bleak thoughts running amok. last night bore the full brunt of the mopiness. i became thirsty, for alcohol. i lusted for vino.

but as always, i snapped back to the old self after knocking back a few drinks in solitude. it wasn't much but enough to reel in my better senses.

today, i was a much happier person.

i went on a shopping spree after a hard day's work on monday. in a release of frustration, i flitted from store front to store end and shopped till i could shop no more.

further to that, i applied for membership cards to two franchises. i must be quite obsessed.

did i feel better after that?

not one bit.

but the days that followed, i instantly found that i had prettier clothes to don. so it did make me feel slightly better in a warped sense.

tonight was especially gratifying. lots of stories and laughters shared amongst the thursday trio (with cia and law). some were really good jaw-aching booming laughters mind you. having good company amounts to a lot. also, it made me believe that good stories should never be swept under the carpet! at least not after what happened tonight.

thursday's officially over. can't wait for tomorrow night.

i'm dog tired. ought to sleep soon. g'night guys!

the mind draws a blank

too tired to think.

need to drown myself in work.

again.

I miss...

the MS Summit days.