an uphill struggle for happiness (nobody ever said it was easy)

did a thorough software clean up of the computer and its working as good as new. no more slow loading woes.

im having major migraine tonight but felt better after i shampooed.

accidentally seeing certain things still affect my mood but im constantly improving on handling it. its a matter of time before it wont affect me anymore, im sure. i named my blog for a reason. it is there to remind me that people and things changes (or metamorphoses) for better or worse and coping with the change is a skill. an art. no matter how much i hate to admit it, im always a lil bit stronger than i thought. i never liked 'fessing up because it makes one obliged to be it (ie strong) as others see it.

mom's close friend passed away a week ago and it just magnified the realization of how fragile human beings really are. after battling with an illness, the doc gave her 2 weeks tops. may god bless her soul, she succumbed less than the given. i cannot even begin to imagine how it must have been for mom and others close to her. but mom was really strong.

it got me thinking that should i be the one to leave this world without so much as a word one day, i definitely dont want no tears. i like being happy and have deemed myself as the greatest, pinkest happy pill should my friends feel blue. or at least i always try.

may i also just add that friends and family are god's greatest gift to me =) there is a constant need to remind self that one ought not to take people for granted.

enough said for one solemn topic.

in other news, i just checked my horoscope and OMG this is fieerce!

that reminds me of ethan's immortal words: that person whom you think is weird might think you are weird too.

it goes both ways i guess!